A New Chapter

Ryder had his first birthday.......it seems like yesterday, I gave birth to him. Of course, Tyson wasn't there. He still claims that Ryder isn't his son even though he looks just like him. I'm past all that now, though. Ryder is MY son and that's all that matters.

Look at that face! How can anyone look at him and not want to claim him? He's just perfect. My mom and dad have really gotten taken with him. They agreed to keep him with them while I went off to school. I got three scholarships, can you believe it? I sure as hell couldn't! Between work and school and Ryder crying nights, I thought I might not graduate at all!

Oh how I miss him! Ryder is such a funny little guy! He's really been good for my mom since grandmother died. They had such a rocky relationship and even their last conversation was an argument. Grandma wanted to blame mom and dad for me getting pregnant. I had to let her know it was my own stupid fault. Mom was pretty down about it but taking care of Ryder makes her smile.

I said that I would hang this picture in my room, and I did. I actually need an updated one because he has grown so much since then......and so have I......

I'm at college now and I gotta say, it's kinda cool. The older I get, the more people tell me I look just like my mom. But now it doesn't bother me so much to hear that....it's such a weird feeling to be out on your own, I call home sometimes just to hear my mom complain!

More than that, I call to check on Ryder's progress. He's learning to talk now and can actually say momma! My mom makes sure he calls her nana and not momma.....it would break my heart if he did! I go up every weekend to see him and I talk to him on the phone everyday even though he doesn't understand half of what I say!

I spend my days working hard to keep my grades up. I need to get the best education possible so that I can make Ryder's life better. By the time I graduate, Ryder will be starting school and I want to be able to provide a good home for him.

Remember my friend Arianna Ying? Well she came to Sim State with me! That girl is the best friend I've ever had! I even talk to Fallon more now. Even though we are at different schools, we try to get together as often as we can which can be hard. She has her responsiblities with Hoh Fruhm and I have Ryder that I have to go and visit. Arianna thinks that I have been working much too hard and insists that we go out tonight.

I'm not really in the mood, but I know better than to argue with Arianna. I don't know, it always feels like I shouldn't be out having fun, ya know? I should be here working on assignments and papers so that I feel like I'm not just abandoning Ryder to have a good time......but I guess it wouldn't hurt to go out this once........

Turns out that it was pretty fun! We go to this creepy looking spot called the Crypt O' Night club and dance the night away. My cousin Eliza Ambrel comes here alot and it's actually a cool place. Arianna has become a real party girl since we got here. She says that now is the time to get it out of her system and suggests that I do the same so I won't regret it later on.......

We get back to the dorms and have some mac and cheese that the cafeteria lady cooked up. That's one of the perks to staying in the dorms, the meals are provided! But I've been reading different cookbooks because I know that I'll have to cook for me and Ryder once I graduate......

Arianna gets up to go to her room and this random guy sits in her place......SO not interested in guys right now! So I get up to leave.

"Hey, I wasn't trying to run you off," he says.

"Don't worry. You didn't," I say as I walk back to my room. The last thing I want or need right now is to get involved with some guy. The only guy for me at the moment is Ryder Ray!

I wake up this morning with a bad feeling. I get those sometimes. I don't know what it is, but I know something bad is going to happen today. I try to shrug it off and get ready for class. Maybe I'm being silly.........

I've been working a writing a children's book......I know it's silly, but I don't know, I think it would be cool to have my own book out there. Ryder could even read it when he grows up. It's funny how having a kid can change you so completely........

Know that bad feeling I was talking about? Well guess who? Tyson Simpson actually has the balls to call my phone.....and I'm sure it isn't just to say hello...........

*I really wanted to send Ryder to school with Christa but I wasn't sure how well that would work out, plus I've heard aging can be an issue. With him at home, I can turn aging off and keep him a toddler until Christa graduates. It just seemed like it would be complicated to send him and I didn't want to bork my game!